Saint Divas: Mainstream Catholic Imagery Vs. The Metal Legacy

Saint Divas: Mainstream Catholic Imagery Vs. The Metal Legacy

I do know that I’m way overdue with this matter but still I can’t help to love the past Met Gala innauguration party last May “Heavenly Bodies: Fashion and the Catholic Imagination”.

I am not catholic, but I’ve always been exposed to it since primary shool and I do gotta say there are a few things of the catholic assemble worth saving: like gothic churches and Renaissance papal commisions… everything else is expendable.

In the other hand I’m a huge mtealhead and this is why, although I loved the celebrities display at the event, I already have seen all the looks before. And the place where I have seen it before, was on stage, wore by metal and rock bands.

Who said that everything’s is a copy of a copy… of a copy? (It was in Fight Club, BTW).

Let’s start this ranking, folks! Who wore it better… or better yet: who was already making catholics angry waaaay back in the day.

It’s on!

1- Rihanna or Pope Emeritus

rihanna ghost bc.jpg
Source: InStyle, Horror Fuel

Now, I’m a fan of Rihanna, for real, no joke here. Truthfully haven’t listened to Ghost BC, but they have been in the scene for a while… and by while I mean since 2008. So definetly the band Ghost wore it first and in my opinion WAY better than the Barbados born hip-hop singer.

Sorry Riri.

2- Rihanna or Marilyn Manson

rihanna MM.jpg
Source: InStyle, Metal Addicts

Rihanna has a another round! BUT 18 Years ago a slimmer and more energetic Marilyn Manson was dressed as a white pope for his music video “Disposable Teens”. The Reverend got a lot of people pissed while Rihanna sexualized the papal attire wich… got a lot of people pissed.

What do you say?, I still find Manson more appealing tho.

3- Eiza González or Nina Hagen

Nina hagen eiza gonzalez.jpg
Source: Francis Apesteguy, Harper’s Bazaar

Someone dared and took the “naughty nun” disguise to a whole haute couture level without being cheap… and that someone was mexican actress Eiza González. Still, the german singer Nina Hagen was already alienizing the nun rope back in 1982 in this Francis Apesteguy shoot.

Forgive us all, mother Hagen, but this thime the winner is Eiza… there’s just too much going on… on your face. As usual.

4- Olivia Munn or Dolores O’Riordan

olivia mun dolores oriordan.jpg
Source: Harper’s Bazaar, Youtube

Gorgeous actress Olivia Munn wore a H&M golden dress with a coat of mail over her head that immediatly got me to the 1994 The Cranberries music video “Zombie”. Frontwoman Dolores O’Riordan was painted in gold, head to toe, with a similar beaded wig… Even if O’Riordan might have looked more like an ancient egiptian goddess you gotta admit it’s a memory popping.

I give my vote to Olivia, but, forever will remember Dolores’ golden voice.

5- Lily Collins or Siouxsie Sioux

lilly collins siouxsie.jpg
Source: Harper’s Bazaar, Youtube

My Batman-fan knowledge was tingling with this one. Actress and daugther of musician Phil Collins, Lily, was wearing a Givenchy piece as a little nun/saint with a tull skirt, BUT I knew I have seen that red tear before.

And then it hit me: It was in the 1992 music video “Face to Face” of classic goth band Siouxsie and The Banshees were we saw a very sexy Siouxsie Sioux in a rubber black dress with face gems.

That song also happens to be Burton’s Batman Returns soundtrack, so there it is, in case you were wondering what all the Batman fuss was about.

Lily, you are a dear, but Siouxsie is EVERYTHING.

6- Amber Heard or María Brinks

maria brink amber heard.jpg
Source: Harper’s Bazaar, Metal Hammer

This is a tought one, guys. Although I’m not a big fan of Amber Heard, you gotta be blind not to admit she’s just gorgeous in this Carolina Herrera dress, but the thing that really got my attention was the head piece.

EVERYBODY was wearing headpieces, halos, and crowns… I just knew I have seen THIS ONE before, and it wasn’t hard to remember where: The band In This Moment and its voice, María Brink0s head. She’s a combination of Lady Gaga fashionista, a metalcore Beyonce and a Rob Zombie’s witch.

I leave the winner up to y’all because I can’t make up my mind.

7- Lana del Rey or Sharon den Andel

sharon den adel lana del rey.jpg
Source: Harper’s Bazaar, Only Sharon den Andel Tumblr

There was a Holy Trinity in the Met Gala: Alessandro Michele, Lana del Rey and Jared Leto were a terrifying cool gang; but, if I ever have to think of an overdose of wings, feathers and corsets, Sharon den Andel of Within Temptation comes to mind. Always.

Sharon is the quintessence steriotype of a goth girl since 1996. Nevertheless, I have to give the bay to Lana because she killed it. Truth be told.

8- Madonna or Anne Nurmi

madonna anne nurmi.jpg
Source: Harper’s Bazaar, angst-im-wald

Speaking of feathers, headpieces, veils and over-the-top style in general is sad to say that Madonna has failed, deeply. You can totally do that in a Jean Paul Gaultier apparently. The queen of pop’s look just makes you say WHAT THE HELL?! when it really it’s supossed to invoque heavenly creatures.

Listen, kids: When you wanna give a goth vibe to the party, all you must do is take a look at the finish singer and tecladist Anne Nurmi from Lacrimosa. She’s been rocking every goth trend from fish nets to leather skirts since 1991 and is with no regrets the queen of pale aristocrat-spook style in cathedral-metal music, if there is such thing.

9- Kate Moss or Till Lindeman

kate moss till lindeman manrilyn manson.jpg
Source: Harper’s Bazaar, Fanpop, Youtube

“Go big or go home” is the premise that Kate Moss decided to ignore when going to the Met Gala. Instead she opted for a simple little black dress from Saint Lauren house wih a little bit un feather fun (meaning boOoRING).

Never dissapointing the metal guys have been wearing feathers more stylishly that the top model for a time now. First, Marilyn Manson did it in 1998 Rock is Dead music video (The Matrix OST) with his see-trough jump suit. Then around 2010, Till Lindeman, a huge german hairy muscle man, decided to tour with his band Rammstein wearing a red feather choker around his neck. How delicate.

Guys, you rocked this one!

10. Mindy Kaling or Freddie Mercury

freddie mercury mindy.jpg
Source: El Comercio, KPFA

Not even the queen of England could wear a massive crown over her head without me comparing and excelling Freddie Mercury in every possible way. Sorry, Mindy, that’s all I have to say about that. It’s definitive: You just can’t.

Source: Harper’s Bazaar

Honorary Mention

She deserves her own mention because there is absolutely no comparison. You just have to check out Blake Lively (you know, Deadpool’s wife) at the Met Gala: Diva, divine, sublime, stunning, majestic, magnificent, insurmountable, masterly perfect… doesn’t sum up to the definition of what this woman really is.

Just wow.

Foto Quién.jpg
Source: Quién

What do you say? Agree with my results? Who else rings a bell?

Even though I loved the gala, wasn’t much surprised because I have already seen it (it has taken me a lifetime of metal band fangirling, but knowledge is knowledge); excep for Blake, she’s a new saint virgin indeed and must be phraised.

Can I get an Amen to that?!


Collage nostalgia: Why my “Dear Diary” wasn’t like the other girls’

Collage nostalgia: Why my “Dear Diary” wasn’t like the other girls’

Recently I was very inspired by @fab.iana posts (go pay a visit, kids! It’d be worth it!) into sharing some corelational content.

Her entries got me thinking retrospectively… because when I was a kid I used to do pieces like that… hardly wanting to compare to art compositions or anything such (!), I did enjoy making analogue collages.

In fact I have several notebooks filled with magazines cuts, shapes, words and pictures.


Suddenly I realized something: Those notebooks were my diaries… not like the “dear diary” pre-pubescent kid shennaningans of how my day was. But they were part of my thoughts and feelings of that trascendental mutation from child to gronw up.

I’ve always like to make collages, I found them not only conforting, but they keep me focused and calm. It’s the mind connected to mechanical bodily processes: as in “using my hands”.

I just like to use my hands to make things “cool” things if possible. Because after all, everything I do ends in a simple mantra: Creation. Construction to add… to improve.


Now, after all those years, I’d like to tell that weirdo of a girl self: “Hey, dumbass! write the freaking date at least!” Because now that I overhaul them I have no fucking clue what they mean.


At the time I had to be thinking about SOMETHING while making them… right? Even a “nothing” is something.


Did I just wanted to frenetically fill the blank pages with pictures?


Although I’d sometimes leave most of the page empty. (Gotta be honest: I do really have a huge intrigue about what was I into at the time to have a Salma Hayek next to a symbol (?) in the middle of two spaces. It itches.)


Or simply payed tribute to my once obsession with crosses?… I do remember that phase, tho.


Sometimes I’d make WEIRD looking doodles… now what the hell is that (freaking out)

Second looking at it I think it has something to do with Marilyn Manson… The singer, never the murder cult leader.


And other times I would build deep images as this… I could find a couple of mindful meanings to that one, actually. How deep, no?

Mind me for a minute, I’m just frowning thinking here.


As years passed by I can clearly notice the collages where a lot more “meaningful” or clearer at least. The hungry pages were running out and I was getting older.


(This is an obvious tribute to Brandon Lee, who was my childhood hero…because of all of the The Crow misterious halo… I know, silly me. Hard to avow.)


Impromptu, changed of diary, change of style: I started to draw, fuzing techniques and making the piece simpler and straightforward.


But still, I can’t tell accurately what this compositions are all about. I’m clueless.


I’m sure it was a confusing time… as all adolescent trials are. Gladly those moments were over without aftermath, and even I don’t know what they were about I did got to overcome them thanks to self expression trough collages.

So, thumbs up for the little artsy me of the time!


Then, Uni came by… and as surprinsingly as it might sound, my mind was less clouded. It’s funny how I found a certain order in all this chaos. It’s peacefull somehow.


Chaos is order, mess is orderly, ramdon shapes become “one”… neat, arrange, shipshape. Wow… now THIS is really the brain of a collage stundent. No wonder we lost our minds over there weekly.


It’s funny how I constantly feel something it’s terribly missing when watching an empty wall. As a matter of fact, places without personality give me anxiety… and the creeps. Only crazy people are minimalist. Patrick Bateman coming to mind.


I know, when I’m an old woman I’d regret to have stop making collages… it’s an effort that other daily trivial task drain off my body. I can’t afford the time (and glue) investment because I have become a blue average adult of the flock.

Sad sigh.


Lastly, as if the spaces in my notebooks were not enough, I found a old, also analog, photo of how my bedroom wall used to like… and I’m beggining to think the American Psycho is in fact sitting on this side of the sreen.


It’s hideous I know. But by the time I thought it was cool. Gladly my mother was the chillest kind there ever was. And to be fair, the collage making save her lots of load in child therapists.

Do you do any art, guys? Let me hear about it!

Hope you ejoy it, ta-da!

Originally posted on Steemit.

High end of low? The nervous breakdown and lovelust of Marilyn Manson

High end of low? The nervous breakdown and lovelust of Marilyn Manson

I might be a little sentimentalist right here but; guys: I’m worried. I’m worried about Marilyn Manson.

Now, hold on, don’t look at me like that. I am not concerned about how a rock singer could affect nowadays post-terrorism youth; or how a 49 year old man with make-up could affect the modern aesthetics steriotypes of middle-America.

No, we’re over that. It’s getting old, actually.

Manson for the cover of Metal Hammer

Maybe somehow it’s a bit late to be writing about this, but the truht it’s been hunting me since it happened. As you might have read or, worse yet, seen: Marilyn Manson had a mental and emotional breakdown on stage. Now hear me out cuz I’m writing this past my bed time after two cups of green tea. I’m living on the edge!

A day after last Valentine’s day, the Antichrist Superstar was giving a concert at the Paramount in Huntington, NY where he just cut his show short after demanding more and more “displays of love from the crowd”. A shamefull fan video is circulatin the webs. On it we can see a very confused Manson asking the fans for applause in order to continue with the concert.

My desk, meaning my bed… and notes

I love MM, but even I know this is pittiful… or at the very least, very worringly. This was so unlike him. Our rockstar has been accused of many despictfull things -some aquited, some not so much- but never of having such a terrible episode while performing before.

It was also reported an even more confused band and crew who, in dread, could only play a jazz-like tune while Manson mumbled undecifrable words to the mic… The musicians obviously didn’t had a clue what the singer was doing.

This Ashtonishing Panorama of the End Times lasted for 15 minutes before Manson refused to finish the show after only performing 7 songs. Angrily, the fans shouted “Refund!” -tears running down my face right now… of sadness and shame. Moral tears.

Source:Daily News NY

I can’t say that gazing my eyes through that tortuous moment didn’t give me anguish. Witnessing The Fall of Adam: that artist you have long admire, follow, sing to, cry to it’s devastating. I know what y’all thinking; maybe I don’t know the man, but I own his albums, sleep wearing t-shirts with his face, and had huge posters in my bedroom walls from ceiling to floor back in the days. So, have some emphaty, people! You all have Justing Bieber tattoos and I’m not here judging… loudly.

Is this the beggining of the end for Marilyn Manson? With all my black heart I’d like to say it’s not, but such scene reminds me of Amy Winehouse’s last years when she refused to perform because she was too drunk to sing. An after a few years, we know the story, Amy was found dead. Her addictions were too severe, she just couldn’t handle it any longer. Tragic.


Can we size up this two characters? I’m not even gonna say it… Even so, I don’t believe Manson’s problem surpass drinking issues.

Instead I think of three devastating scenarios that could have lead The Reverend to that disgracefull night in New York. First of all, let’s recall a previous incident, also on stage, equally laughable, where Manson’s leg was crushed by a stage prop (there are also a couple of ignominious videos of that very moment). The injury send our musician to a surgery that owned him a few screws in his leg an anckle. Ouch.

After all of this story telling: Manson recognized he was in a lot of pain so we can assume he was under painkillers. And let’s be honest, americans are crazy about feeling numb so I strongly doubt doctors would’ve just given him ibuprofene. And that’s how maybe his very publicly breakdown was a result of a heavy medicated elder man. Or can’t you see a resemblance to our drunken grandpas at Christmas parties? Am I right or am I right? That’s scenario one.

Source:Los Angeles Daily News

Another possibility, and the most frightening, it’s that he was so loaded on drugs that, for the first time in his career, was completely out of himself (remember Amy’s example back there?) and was disabled from singing. Spooky… and sad. We all know, from the very same serpent’s tongue, he has experienced with drugs, specially acid. But what we do not know is if he’s currently under some other influence… appart from his own ego who appears to be a whole different person that gives very bad advices.

Lastly and furthermore intesresting: This happened a day after Valentine’s, wich means this occurrence could’ve been a product of a broken heart… to put things more realistic: The fear of a human being of getting old alone, I mean… older, in his case. And this is a sentiment we can all relate to. This idea struck me particularly because of the insistent demand of love and applause. It was a cry for help, you guys!

I don’t know about you but I would definetly feel my love life is over after divorcing a gal such as Dita Von Teese (couldn’t care less about Rachel or Lindsay). Just saying.


The leader of the Spooky Kids is made from flesh and blood like us… just with a make up ability higher than most. At the end of a fourth decade of living shifting the mainstream Marilyn Manson could be in the middle of a crisis, questioning his place on earth, death (he lost both of his parents last year), about his carreer, his music and himself… and kids, maybe? Aging must be a very difficult stage to accept, specially when you don’t fell as wasted as you look; and it’s impossible to deny Manson’s physical decay.

How mundane: The Antichrist of music appears not to be much different than us down here in the gutter after all. I do hope I get to be as rich as him by the time I’m 49, tho. In the bottom line I’m just a simple woman shouting to the dark: “Don’t you dare die on me, man! We have already lost Dolores O’Riordan earlier this year!” Couldn’t take it.

What you think, have an “scenario 4” in your head? Tell me all about it. It’s late kiddos, I’m out.

Originally posted on Steemit.

7 Reasons why Ben Affleck is a hell of a good Batman (if not the best)

7 Reasons why Ben Affleck is a hell of a good Batman (if not the best)

Now, let me tell you something, there are some reasons out there of why people in general hate Ben Affleck regardless making the Batman/Bruce Wayne character and I can’t find a solid good one to tell me: “Hey, that’s it”.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m not a huge Ben Affleck fan, haven’t seen Gone Girl, wich is apparently one of his best recent performances; nor even ever watched Good Will Hunting wich grant him an Oscar award. But I did loved The Accountant and, on the other hand, definitely greatly disliked -not to say hate- Daredevil.

Photo: Rock&Pop

And before you continue reading, let’s get one thing straight, I do think Affleck is a great Batman, and you might or might not continue reading after this statement, but if you do choose to stay, just let me tell you why.

First of all, there are two main reasons I could gathered why Batman fans don’t quite see Affleck as the Dark Knight. One has to do with the reincarnation of our superhero in the flesh of Christian Bale in Nolan’s trilogy. It was solid, Bale’s a veteran and the direction and art concept weren’t a complete disaster, in fact, were brilliant, clean, consistent, realistic and dark.

Photo: AceShowbiz

I grant Bale’s success mainly to Christopher Nolan’s direction with a good supporting cast such as Heath Ledger’s Joker and Tom Hardy playing Bane. The realistic concept of the films was original and totally opposite to the previous Batman and Robin made by Joel Schumacher; or how I like to call it “the movie that we wish never existed”.

To be honest I don’t like Bale as Batman as much as all of you do, but I acknowledge his accomplishment.

In second place, those who saw the Daredevil fiasco could have fallen into panic when Affleck was announce to play our beloved Batman in the fears that he could have tear the part completely into pieces… again.

But let’s be cool about it; he didn’t. Affleck did a really great job.

Photo: Screen Rant

1.- To get it out of the way, Affleck is a really good looking Bruce wayne, even more than Bale… as the comic’s Bruce Wayne is supposed to be: a mature playboy, hot, rich and rough-looking muscle man. Affleck is even more akin the Warner Bros. animated version of Wayne; that is a huge-square kind of shape. And this is the fan-girly reason right here.

2.- To be playing a very disturbed man wearing a bat suit, Affleck really delivers. In Batman Vs. Superman: Dawn of Justice, the actor lets settle that the Batman job it’s taking a toll on Bruce… a mental toll. No other Batman has been able to demonstrate kind of break down on the screen. This brings another dark shade to the character, as it’s supposed to be.

Photo: Pop Sugar

3.- Affleck pulls off Wayne AND Batman. Just for you to know my favorite Batman ever it’s and will always be Michael Keaton -yes I’m a 90’s kid, or was… whatever- but as much as I love him as the Batman, Keaton could never deliver a great Bruce Wayne, to me the Wayne in him was to much a kind of yuppie; not dark enough… just cashing sirens.
Affleck does de Wayne with style and mystique, and he’s a kicking *ss costumed vigilante, in other words: a BAMF.

4.- He’s mad. Ben Affleck’s Batman it’s just bat sh-t crazy. Unlike any other Batman, this one it’s out of himself for some moments there. He’s not only plain angry; he’s paranoid, lies to Alfred, and has mommy issues… This is the natural development of the character: a man who’s fought crime throughout his life just to see that evil never quits, never stops no matter how hard you fight it, it’s always going to be there. What can that do to a man’s syque?

Photo: Daily Mail

5.- Not the good guy. Affleck’s Batman it’s just not the good guy anymore… talking about branding bad villains like cattle. Even if this feature falls a little afar from the comic book character, this is a new approach were the superhero adapts to darker times, to meaner criminals. He’s willing to do anything to save the day, except of course murder people. That would retire him from the superhero hall of fame.

6.- His suit it’s the most faithful to the comic books that other before. Even if you love Burton’s bug-like version like I do, Affleck suit it’s the closest to the classical look of the gray and black armour; perhaps we’ll see some yellow soon, maybe?

Photo: Comic Book

7.- And Ben Affleck just loves to Play Batman: During the Justice League Hall in the 2017 ComicCon the actor said that “It was f-cking amazing” to play the role of and that he was very excited for the JL movie. Unlike Christian Bale who revealed, during an interview in Josh Horowitz’s podcast Happy Sad Confuse, that he doesn’t like superhero movies. Too much excitement for a british I guess?

Come on! I like an actor who’s a little or even more excited for his job like we are! Or it didn’t cast you down the “Sad Affleck” meme that made us believe the actor was devastated because fans didn’t like him as Batman? People, have a heart!

Post originally feature on Steemit.

¿Por qué nos molestan tanto los selfies?

AVISO PREVIO: ¿Por qué nos molestan tanto los selfies? es una pregunta real; no retórica. De verdad quisiera saber por qué existen personas que se molestan tanto por los selfies y ridiculizan  quienes lo practican. Lo que quiero decir que al final de este post no encontrarás una lista de razones por las cuales todos odiamos los selfies. De hecho, a mi me gustan las fotos, me gusta tomarme selfies y publicarlas. Sabes que a ti también.

Aunque no necesite una razón legítima más allá de “porque puedo” para explicar por qué estoy a favor de los selfies, trataré de exponer las razones por las cuales defiendo la praxis.

Además, en serio quisiera saber por qué te molestan tanto que otros se tomen selfies. En serio, participa y cuéntame; pero no se vale decir solo que es “tonto”.


Si te es desconocido el término, el empowerment significa literalmente “ganar poder”. Tomar acción y apoderarse de algo, generalmente algo abstracto como liderazgo, confianza, control. Este apoderamiento es algo positivo, porque reconoce en la persona las posibilidades que tiene sobre sí mismo y cómo puede influenciar en su entorno.

Los selfies son consecuencia directa del empowerment de la imagen personal. En una sociedad que históricamente ha sido dueña de la imagen de los individuos, sentimos que no nos pertenecemos sino a un sistema que generalmente -y secretamente- rechazamos. Un selfie es una declaración gráfica de nuestra posesión personal: Yo soy mío, me reconozco y te hago saber que nadie tiene poder sobre mi más que yo mismo.

Un ¡urra! por el empoderamiento.

“Me amo”

Se que van a decir que mucho de algo bueno se vuele malo; que la vanidad es dañina y perjudicial. ¿Pero en verdad es dañina y perjudicial? ¿Negativo para quién? ¿Nocivo cómo? ¿Qué daño a la humanidad per se hace alguien que se toma selfies?

Lo mismo dijeron los seudoeruditos los primeros años de vida de la televisión, que era una caja creadora de zombies, ahora es un aparato casi vital. Si el argumento es que quienes se toman selfies son personajes tan narcisos que no contribuyen al mejoramiento de la humanidad, pues la mayoría de las personas que no se toman sielfies en general tampoco lo hacen. No veo una relación directa con tomarse selfies y no ser voluntario en un comedor comunitario, hacer donaciones o reciclar.

Sin embargo, el claro aspecto positivo del selfie es expresar un amor y autoestima válido. Es una proclamación pública de amor propio. Y si consideras que es estúpido sentir amor por uno mismo entonces considera esto: “Si no te amas a ti mismo, entonces cómo demonios vas a amar a alguien más”, o practicar la caridad, la bondad. Todos sabemos que la humanidad tiene una alta carencia de amor.

-Este punto tiene una alta relación con el feminismo y la recuperación del cuerpo y vida de las mujeres; pero no quiero desviar la atención ni provocar a los poco inteligentes haters-

La vieja historia del “fit in”

Es la naturaleza humana: Ser aceptados y pertenecer a un grupo. Está grabado en nuestro ADN, es necesario para la supervivencia. Nuestra sanidad mental depende de ello. Aceptémoslo, todos queremos ser aceptados, recibir esa confirmación social que de alguna manera nos diga que somos una parte “normal” de la sociedad. A lo mejor no queremos ser normales, solo necesitamos que nuestros pares reconozcan que no somos unos sicópatas.

Entonces, qué mejor manera de expresar aceptación y afecto que con “likes”. Sí, tal vez la era de las telecomunicaciones y la información nos ha transformado en seres fríos que divulgan estimación a través de pantallas de computadoras. Es lo que la evolución tecnológica nos ha llevado y, seamos honestos, lo recibimos con los brazos abiertos. Es fácil, rápido y asequible. Para terminar este punto sin querer desviarme mucho del tema, aun hay gente que prioriza el contacto humano sobre el digital; lo bueno es que tenemos la opción de elegir uno o el otro.

Los “likes”, sin duda se convirtieron en la carrera para alcanzar la popularidad, y muchos caímos en esa trampa. Queremos ser los mejores, los más populares, los más originales, los que tienen más seguidores, mas “likes” y más “share”. Ese es el punto, por qué entonces compartir si no queremos esa retribución.

El inconveniente, sé lo que estás pensando, es que hay muchas personas idiotas muy populares, “famosas por ser famosas”, que son intrascendentes, no particularmente inteligentes ni contribuyentes a un mejor mundo . Pero tenemos que reflexionar en quiénes fueron lo que los transformaron en famosas y por qué. El gran acto de rebeldía es dar unfollow, no retuitear y no dar like a lo que nos parece inútil o estúpido.

A pesar de esto, las Kardashian tienen alrededor de 50 millones de seguidores en Instagram -casi que cada una- y Katy Perry tiene más de 70 millones en Twitter. Si quieres que esto cambie pues comienza a seguir a quienes te inspiren y según tus intereses contribuyan al mundo… aunque sé que no dejaras de espiar el fanpage de Shakira en Facebook que, por cieto, tiene más de 100 millones de fanáticos.

¡Pero qué importa!

Por último, estoy a favor de cualquier medio que permita a la gente expresarse, ser libre y opinar responsablemente. A mi no me molesta que la gente se tropiece en la calle con un poste por andar tomándose selfies; cada quien a lo suyo.

Si me interesa saber por qué a algunos les enfurecen estas prácticas, ¿tu qué opinas?

Los muros de la urbe en papel

La ciudad es una bombonera de oportunidades, experiencias, romances y tragedias; pero en una urbe, los bocadillos surtidos se entre mezclan en un caos, se pierden en un huracán apresurado. El precipitado apuro, la urgencia súbita del ritmo de la urbe difumina la percepción del tiempo y nuestros actos en él. La vida dentro de una urbe es peculiar y ofrece ciertos aspectos de los cuales otras ciudades carecen.

Son muchos los rasgos de las urbes que las hacen de personalidades estrambóticas: el exceso; sus engranajes que giran en un aparente desorden; el dinamismo perenne como un perpetum mobile, la urbe siendo una batería que se alimenta a sí misma y nunca se detiene; el abarrotamiento, la congestión, el casi atascamiento en el cual no cabría un suspiro; las celdas donde todo tiene desarrollo, donde todo surge a la vida, son espacios cerrados de cuatro paredes y un techo;  el paisaje diferente de una urbe, un panorama cubista de figuras anguladas que se confunden entre las nubes; el olor a fabricado; la sobrepoblación.

Las crónicas urbanas dibujan lo cotidiano, esbozan el paisaje de la vista diaria en una urbe: lo que se percibe al salir de un apartamentico, montarse en el ascensor y bajar unos pisos para encontrarse con el concreto negro infinitamente pisoteado, los laberintos de edificaciones, el circo variado de transeúntes que se unen en una misma caravana, la peregrinación multitudinaria en el transporte público y la llegada a otro espacio reservado donde se labora o se estudia.

Las crónicas urbanas, entonces, son los retratos de estas ciudades de distintiva raza; pero no son imágenes generales, son esbozos de detalles que hablan por sí solos de la particularidad de una urbe, detalles que describen mucho más a una ciudad caótica en específico que el relato de su generalidad.

Las crónicas urbanas constituyen anécdotas del cadáver exquisito que sus habitantes ayudan a formar. Caracas, siendo indiscutiblemente una urbe por ostentar las características de estas ciudades que existen en el caos y la premura ha sido razón de la autoría de crónicas urbanas. Elisa Lerner ha escrito En el entretanto: Un solitario elogio a Zapata, un personaje propio de la urbe caraqueña, un ícono, una personalidad de referencia extendida al ámbito nacional; y Federico Vegas, quien compuso El valle y la trama, describe la fisionomía de Caracas, una ciudad que siempre ha sido y será una dama voluptuosa rodeada y protegida por gendarmes: las montañas.

En Un solitario Elogio a Zapata, Lerner escribe sobre un personaje único en la urbe que exhibe, en una de las encrucijadas donde sus diferentes tonos se encuentran, un mural enorme del artista, una referencia que ha echado raíces como característica natural de Caracas. La autora describe el rechazo de los venezolanos en reconocer y expresar la genialidad de los artistas nativos: “En relación a un trabajo del artista nuestro podemos decir, muy apurados, vamos, <<el hombre tiene genio>> pero decir, simple y llanamente, que el artista es un genio, peligro, peligro (…), es acercarlos demasiado a Dios y trastocar de esa manera la paz del mundo”, explica.

En El Valle y la trama, Vegas expone la lucha que aún se desenvuelve entre los habitantes de Caracas y la topografía de la ciudad. Nuestra metrópoli con su arquitectura y desarrollo como urbe ha extinguido la vegetación legítima del lugar. Vegas escribe: “La arquitectura es indetenible, ineludible, omnipresente (…) en mis recorridos, puedo sentir a los valles y quebradas luchando por no desdibujarse y muchas veces, venciendo.” Ambos temas a desarrollar en las crónicas son innegablemente propios de las urbes.

Pedro León Zapata
Pedro León Zapata

Las crónicas urbanas deben crearse de manera que resulten atractivas, seductoras a la lectura, deben ofrecer una reflexión y a la vez entretenimiento; deben estar construidas de manera clara y sutil, con un lenguaje innovador, un estilo causal y fresco pero elegante, una extensión, si se quiere, breve; las crónicas deben emular a las urbes que describen.

La estructura de El Valle y la Trama y de Un solitario elogio a Zapata parecen tener un esqueleto similar. Ambas crónicas tienen un argumento como apertura, en el sentido más científico que la técnica: una hipótesis, posteriormente se desarrolla una serie de demostraciones y explicaciones que apoyao dicha hipótesis.

El estilo de El valle y la trama es anecdótico, el autor combina sus recuerdos y experiencias de la ciudad con un arqueo histórico sobre la lucha hombre-vegetación dentro del valle caraqueño. Vegas utiliza fuentes como la reflexión de su propio padre y de Alejandro Alcega; arquitecto del Hotel Los Frailes; investigaciones de hombres que examinaron el drama de la lucha como Gonzáles Gorronda, Borges Villegas y Armand Planchart; consultas a informes, mapas, planos y dibujos de la ciudad. Todo esto expuesto de una manera ordenada; pero presentado de forma que no raya en la pesadez del rigor científico.

Por otra parte, el autor se coloca en acción protagónica, sin opacar a la estrella de la crónica: Caracas y su batalla histórica. El autor escribe frases como “hace algunos años escuché a mi padre decir”, “en esos mismos años empecé a tener una relación intensas con la ciudad, buscaba un sitio donde vivir y trabajar”, “la frase de mi padre me acompaña siempre”, “siento al Ávila como un fiador”; de este modo, infiero, que Vegas tenía como objetivo demostrar que Caracas y sus historias son anécdotas personales, le pertenecen, son propias, suyas. Posteriormente el escritor cambia el estilo y escribe: “La primera imagen que conocemos de Caracas”, “casi todo lo que hemos hablado”, “a lo largo de nuestro valle”; como recursos para, ahora, incluir a los lectores como una parte más de la urbe; ahora la crónica no es sólo de Vegas, es nuestra lucha como son nuestras montañas y nuestra Caracas.

Mural de Zapata en la Universidad Central de Venezuela - vista desde la autopista Francisco Fajardo

Elisa Lerner, en Un solitario elogio a Zapata, crea una crónica que no cuenta una historia, ni hechos, ni describe un lugar; narra a un hombre, a un artista, como un cuento que todavía no tiene final. La crónica urbana de Lerner es de carácter reflexivo, su estilo lleva hacia el cuestionamiento intelectual de un problema en cuestión, y al final, deja cabida a que el propio lector llegue a una conclusión propia de su discernimiento como habitante de Caracas y sujeto susceptible a la apreciación del arte. El estilo parece centrarse en la simulación de un discurso.

Lerner escribe: “La narrativa referencia a ríos gigantescos que podrían llevar en el duro regazo de sus enormes piedras la mitad de los sueños futuros de los hombres, invita a pensar que, en América Latina, no hay solo vastedad de soledades geográficas”. Es estilo de la autora es casual, utiliza metáforas; pero no deja de ser distinguido y refinado.

En cuanto al lenguaje de Vegas en El valle y su trama, utiliza unas estructuras lingüísticas tradicionales que no alimentan muchas figuras literarias más que la pura descripción y narración. Sin embrago, su estructura no es estrictamente formal, sino es un cuento cantado entre oraciones de bella creación y consonancia musical con abundante sentido de familiaridad y pertenencia. El autor escribe frases y oraciones como: “Siento al Ávila como un fiador, un fuerte hermano mayor, una reserva infinita en la defensa de sus colinas menores”, por ejemplo.

Para Elisa Lerner, en Un solitario elogio a Zapata, el lenguaje sirvió como vehículo para apaciguar el caudal desbordado de la naturaleza vehemente de la discusión. Zapata es un genio, ¿Por qué no llamarlo como tal… y  a vox populi?, es el gran punto de ebullición inherente de la crónica. Así la escritora escribe, por ejemplo, con un lenguaje apropiado y con forma más íntima y ligera: “En esta ocasión los dibujos de las caricaturas semejan una suerte de work in progress para el trazado plástico de los personajes de los cuadros. Aunque seguramente, no hay tal work in progress.

Son dos lugares comunes en Caracas: Zapata y la lucha naturaleza-arquitectura que por separado, trazan una imagen clara de la urbe más acertada que si, en tal caso, ambos autores hubiesen descrito a Caracas, grosso modo, como una ciudad atestada de edificios, rodeada de una maraña de autopistas y con un Metro que serpentea por debajo de los transeúntes inadvertidos… sin matices, ni detalles, carente de pinceladas. Son crónicas de las mañas de la urbe que la hacen distinta de las otras ciudad.